sincerity

there are times where my dad will get annoyed with my mum being too nice to our relatives.
not because dad is stingy..it is because dad loves mum too much.
and when she is not getting the appreciation that she deserves.
as the daughter, of course, i am annoyed too.
but mum is only trying to teach us something about being in a family.
in a family, being nice does not need something in return..
and no matter how screwed up one is, family will help in any way possible and then smack them awake from their screwed up life.
there are times where it does seem my mum is being the foolish one.
having to cater all the requests and stuffs..
but one thing my mum earned from this is she is in everyone's heart.
that no matter what happens, they remember her..
and to mum, that is enough.
many times, my parents argued because of my relatives' issues and honestly, i hated that they were the reasons to their argument for i do not think it is worthy at all.
but even so, i have to agree with mum..
BUT i still hope she gets what she deserves.
i hope these ppl will remember that my mum has the choice of just walking away from u all but she didn't.
she stuck with u all instead, despite the erratic behaviours of each of u.
and i forgive my dad, he is only protecting mum.

so, being a fool because u truly care is ain't that bad.
but on the bad side, u could get hurt.
i can only believe that sincerity will break the ice and that despite feeling like a fool and hurt, i will touch their heart one day.
i know i am more conscious with my self-protection now..
i think i am just getting a bit more scared about getting hurt.
it became an auto self-defense mechanism now in order to keep my brain sane and cause less pain to the heart.
what a sad case..
but then..i can't help but really come to care for a number of ppl.
and so, after writing this, i guess it is okay to be a fool.
i know i am happy being one and will regret if i am not one.